Molestation and its repercussions

How many of us have been molested? And how many of us have spoken about it? I've had guy friends who were molested as children too. I was..for a period of 6 years approximately. It started when I was about 6 years of age, and ended only when I attained puberty. That too it might not have ended there, but for the fact that I had been exposed to sex education and now understood that what was happening was wrong.

I was so scared of all men, including my dad and grandad, that I refused to be alone in the room with any man. However, this is something my parents still don't know. Maybe they guess, but I haven't told them in any case.

Getting back to being normal and not flinching when a guy touched me has been a long and tedious process. I still get uneasy if I have to be with a guy alone in a room for whatever reason.

I'm glad it happened, by the way. Because now I know that I'll ensure it never happens to my kids. I also have confidence in myself because I stood up to my molester and told him to back off or I'd report it to my parents. Yet for all my platitudes, it'll haunt me forever....

Relationships

I'm clueless. People say its hard to understand women, I beg to disagree. Can anyone explain why men are such perverse creatures? They don't compliment you nor say why they like you. Then they claim that they do care about you and you're supposed to know it? Pray tell me how? We're not mind readers, are we? Neither are we telepaths that we'll get to know what you are thinking.

Loneliness is a silent killer

Loneliness kills. No seriously, I mean it. It does kill a person. It is like a termite which gnaws away on wood till the entire piece becomes hollow and nothing but the outer shell remains. It slowly saps the person’s strengths, drains away all hopes leaving behind an emptiness which seems never-ending. Loneliness is the most debilitating of all emotions leaving behind nothing but negativity in its wake. It covers you like a shroud, blanking out all happiness and positivity and leaving only darkness.

Have you ever experienced it? I hope you haven’t, but in case you have, you would know what I am talking about. Right? Maybe you haven’t felt it this intensely; maybe you’ve experienced it in a lesser degree, but each of us, at some point of time, have experienced this emotion.

And you know something else? Some people, who you think are very happy and have no cares in this world, are the loneliest. They use their smiles to hide their sadness from the world. I’m sure you’ve come across such people. I have.

I’m no doctor or I don’t claim to give you a sure-fire cure for loneliness. There isn’t one! But in case you have a better idea, do let me know. In the meanwhile, I’ll tell you what I do. I’m a music fan and although I wish to listen to sad songs and ghazals when I am lonely, I do the exact opposite. I listen to music to which I can dance. In a short while, I feel much better.

Call and talk to friends whom you haven’t spoken to in a long time. You’ll definitely be livelier. Do something which you love to, be it pampering yourself or simply going for a walk. Take time out to breathe, meditate or just relax. Learn to be thankful about what you have and not mope about what you don’t. Lastly, remember you are your own best company. Take the time to discover yourself and you’ll see yourself in a new light. In this way, you’ll be on your way to becoming a better person.

P.S. I know its easier to preach rather than practice but I sincerely believe you can help yourself.